What do you want? What do you WANT? (Anyone else thinking about The Notebook scene here?!)
Or better yet, when was the last time you even asked yourself that question?
For a lot of us, myself included, the immediate questions that follow after we ask ourselves a question like this, are:
- Am I just being selfish?
- Does anybody ever really get what they want?
- Who even has time to think about it?
As the seasons change, I often find myself asking the big questions, like: What is my role in my own life and my own healing? What is my role in the lives of others? How do I both serve God and also pursue my own dreams? What does it mean to love others above ourselves?
Like I said… BIG questions.
If those questions have your head spinning too, you are going to LOVE this week’s episode! I absolutely loved getting to sit down and chat with Dr. Alison Cook about all of this. We dove into the content of her book and addressed all of these questions head on.
As we did, I was struck by this truth:
“In order to love my neighbor as myself well…that means I must first be willing to love myself. ”
But why do we struggle with this so much…
Mary’s new book, slow growth equals strong Roots is HERE! Click HERE to Order your copy today!
Alison points to three major reasons why we are so quick to address everyone else’s needs and not our own.
1.) Childhood wounds – Family dynamics play a large role in our formation and often lead to us prioritizing the needs of others over our own.
2.) Confusing church messages – What does it really mean to take up my cross? To deny myself? Does that mean that every desire and hope that I have for my life must be squashed?
3.) Cultural conditioning of women – Women, more than men, are often told to play small and not make waves.
So maybe the question isn’t “Am I being selfish?”…
Maybe the question is “How can I love myself more in order to love others more? How can I love myself in order to be more like Jesus?”
It feels radical, friends!
However, it is necessary.
Alison talks about both “Big T” trauma and “little T” trauma, and how no matter the type, trauma leaves wounds that must heal.
In today’s episode, Mary chats with Dr. Alison Cook – therapist and author of the new book “The Best of You: Break Free from Painful Patterns, Mend Your Past, and Discover Your True Self in God.”
They discuss how exactly to show up as the Best of YOU, things like:
- Making (and keeping!) small commitments to build trust with yourself
- The fight, flight, fawn, freeze responses and how to stop hiding
- Extending compassion to your inner critic
Listen and be encouraged by her wisdom!
May this episode be your reminder to ask one of the BIGGEST questions of all:
“How would your life change if you could show up as your truest self? “
I can’t wait for you to take a listen! And if you are looking to give up hiding, comparing, people pleasing, performing, and achieving for your worth, I think you’ll LOVE my new book Slow Growth Equals Strong Roots! Available now everywhere books are sold! And while you’re at it, take our Achiever Quiz to see which of the 5 Achiever Types you are….The
More From This Episode:
Connect with Dr. Alison Cook on Instagram and be sure to pick up her new book, “The Best of You: Break Free from Painful Patterns, Mend Your Past, and Discover Your True Self in God.” wherever books are sold.
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